So I had sex in the woods... it was just as dirty as you'd expect it would be.. and not in a good way.
David Carradine died? Should I be thinking about this 10 min before my interview?
Haha just ref him when they ask a questin about kung fu which they will since ur Asian
I have decided that a Nickelback cover band would be the pinnacle of loserdom.
So I was throwing up in this fancy toilet at a party last night, when he decided it would be funny to flush it. It was a beday. I had to walk out with toilet water and regurgitated rumpleminze all over my face and shirt.
47 days without vaginal penetration. Im pretty sure it's grown over.
Do you realize that if your cunt was a missing person it would be assumed dead?
just got high and bedazzled my bra. other than bleeding from the prongs life is so good.
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
You told him that your vagina was the "King Crab" of all vagina's.
They tried to convince me I broke Alex's nose. Also they stranded me on the roof.
That's what they get for locking a drunk laxer in Mitch's car.
But theres a keg here and me gusta
We've cranked the heat for blizzard versions of all of our strip games. Come over.
I'm making a quesadilla and including it in the picture because that's the only way I think I can send her dick pics.
My hangover didn't kick in until like 4pm so I found myself puking in the middle of Times Square. During rush hour. In a three piece suit. A spongebob came by and patted me on the back.
the only things my left hand does: catch/hold things and masturbation.
holy shit the yoga instructor bought his baby pig to class today
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