Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
alright got my week's quota of sex in, ready for modern warfare 2
Lesbian chick is doing her presentation on the time she woke up on the dockside still drunk at 7 am. This is why I show up to chinese class.
you were cooking a hot pocket with a grill lighter what did you want me to do
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
And im sorry for wishing your girlfriend gets genital warts.
If i had 4 hands right now is have booze in 3 of them and my cock in the other all because you went to denver. just sayin.
apparently putting your t-shirt on your head with a bottle of captain and telling girls your the pirate king of tallahassee doesn't work
There is blood on the door to my room, I have to go to sleep
I want you to get off the plane and get directly into my pants
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
So what happened? Or does sex + ramen pretty much cover it?
I basically have the attention span of a ferret on meth when it comes to men
I learned that I order a bunch of dollar shots at the bar and once it's ready turned around and say "who wants pay?" And someone will pay
Don't come up here. Strippers r crying.
You'd think that a rotation of two 30 year old men could keep me satisfied... WHY ISN'T THERE A MAN THAT CAN KEEP UP WITH MY HEALTHY SEXUAL APPETITE?!
I’m torn. She’s crazy - like legitimately “Wear your skin as a suit” crazy. But her blow jobs and dirty talk are Pornhub quality!
Randomize