never have i ever had a craving for dick this badly
I didnt pay $190 for a fake with a new middle name of Vane..
Nope it's a specific set of cards not like a normal ace, queen king thing....kinda like UNO, but instead of yelling UNO you get shitfaced
Were going to have to vacuum the bathtub, great party
Quick! What do I wear on a 4 hour road trip with an older guy in the army I had pantomime sex with in a hotel a few months ago?
We fucked then made friendship bracelets, his mother taught him right!
Drunk at work, covered in Cheetos is no way to go through life.
I found Cheetos.
Is he gonna be my crazy ex? Cause we weren't even together for as long as my weeklong bicurious lesbian relationship.
Walking into class right now and I swear to god I smoked down the substitute teacher we have at a party I went to last week
Did you clean his pubes up off the table yet?
She climbed up the stairs with three brownies in one fist, two in the other, and one in her mouth. Also, she opened the bedroom door with her foot. I may be in love.
Tbh.. I hope he still watches our sex tapes so he can be reminded of what he's missing out
you do realize the next step is naked mud wrestling, right?
She was topless, yelling this is Sparta, threatening to push her dad into the sewer. I am pretty sure she won't be at school.
I twisted my ankle while drunkenly playing in my adult kickball league. Now I'm having to use my grandpa's cane to walk at this party. I am so single.
Randomize
