I'm taking a dump and eating a fortune cookie and it said "Force it to be successful"
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
I'm thinking of having one or both of my boobs out. They're small but they're mighty.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
she was on her period so I asked if she wanted to make ass babies
I wish there was some sort of "recently added" function for blackberrys so i could see what random numbers i got from the night before
sober me hid the cigs from drunk me. sober me is a tricky bitch.
Just did the walk of shame in front of his dad while I was wearing his gym shorts and my heels from graduation last night. Keep it classy '12
let's make a party pact right now just as precaution for this trip: ill make sure you don't piss yourself if you make sure I don't bang my cousins friends. deal?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I don't know bro. If a girl makes you cum hard enough that you pull a back muscle, she might be the perfect one to call for a massage on said muscle.
He was telling me about how he's leaving on his Mission next week... While we were having sex in the back of his car.
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
I just smoked part of an Oreo cuz I thought it was some hash you left
Look idk the rules and regulations of our freindship...but I need you to carry me to my car.
I now have scissors specifically made for cutting dicks off.
Randomize