Please advise as to how precisely ashamed I should be if I just became sexually aroused by a Harry Potter and the Half Blood Prince preview
i say over christmas we have a beer pong competition with the cousins and see who really has the best genes in the family.
Kill yourself wednesday started off with a bang, and im pretty sure im still drunk from tequila tuesday.
The office pool is up to $500 if you take a shit in Frank's desk drawer. Time to change the unpaid internship into a cash cow.
I literally told her "she's a sandwich I'd like to make" and that's all it took
It feels like one of my ribs evaporated.
I CRIED after phone sex. Am I gay?
6 tequila shots, 3 kamikazes and 1 rumplemintz.. The next day I puked in my office trash can while doing payroll. I may have to dock my own pay for lack of class.
Part of me really wants this picture, but the other part of me knows if he is really this drunk, he could be sodomizing a lamp and not know it
lost her for two hours. she was banging a russian guy in her car in the parking lot. he told her she was majestic.
yeah im watching him make his speech now. cant take him seriously tho. hes talking about funding for education and all i can think about is how ive seen what he looks like wearing womens underwear...
my ex's current girlfriend held my hair as I threw up. new low.
It's 4:30 AM and I just walked through a line of 10 deer without them freaking out. I am the campus deer king.
i love you and all, but can that be the last orgy with your wife?
Started my new year off by being hospitalized with pneumonia. You?
Found out I'm pregnant.
I'll stick with pneumonia.
Randomize
