I haven't been laid since Bush was president.
the #6 from wendy's when stoned is definitely better than sex. i dont care what anyone says.
Is it a bad that I spent my 5 year anniversary with my husband texting my ex boyfriend?
you could tell him that chauvinism doesn't go very well with his gay homemade tank top
Is This New Dating App Elitist…Or Genius?
I fell asleep to the sounds of them banging in the next room. It was oddly soothing...
I don't remember his name but he sat in the bathroom and gave us both advice...
all i care about is the story behind my toaster ending up in the microwave
says the girl that drank her shots like they were in a dog bowl
i woke up with my wallet keys and phone missing and a treasure map to find them stapled to my shirt.
haha i know
Stay Away From These 29 Online Dating Red Flags
Best part? I know that the likelyhood of this turning into an intimate relationship is like 4.25%
After we had breakup sex it took him longer to say goodbye to my boobs than it did to me...
I had a dream last night that I met Diplo. Now I'm just sad
I WOULD NEVER LIE ABOUT SOMETHING AS SERIOUS AS SABADO GIGANTE BEING CANCELED
i want george washington to fuck me as hard as he can holy shit
Do you have feelings for this penis?