chick im bringing home just asked our cab driver if she could do a line off his turban. i think im in love - or trouble.
I get free beer too. Its called a vagina and its accepted everywhere like visa
I hope my theory books are in my locker, but if not, I guess I can always share with you.
Who said I want to share with you?
You've sucked my dick, I'm pretty sure you don't care if I look at your theory book.
girl in the front row yawned. double jointed jaw. i know where i'll be sitting next class
he's totally gay but hes wondering what hes missing out on. Im going to show him.
no pressure.
I gave you a 45 minute blowjob. You were inside me for 3 minutes. I'm going to need you to get your shit together.
Got into the physics lab with my student id, hooked up over break when school was closed. I regret no payments for tuition.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I would lick a homeless mans crack teeth for a cup of coffee right now.
Took "drink until he's cute" to a whole new level last night...
Oh no. Did you guys fuck on my pull out couch?
There is maybe 10 hours out of any given day we aren't sober.
I blasted the Halloween Before Christmas soundtrack last night so my roommate wouldn't hear me having sex. Needless to say the sex got a little weird.
Does it count as a threesome if your friend drunkenly has sex on top of you while you're passed out?
Coworker just walked in thirty minutes late reeking like weed and clutching a handful of scratch-off tickets. Also, there’s still a stripper pole in my office. Happy Wednesday!
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