WHO ATE OUR COOKIES WHAT THE FUCK THOSE WERE GOURMET
and thats how i got kicked in the balls by micky mouse
Party in the USA is so catchy!
Yea, so is AIDS.
He just made me a heart out of cocaine... i think i'm in love
I think you're asking the wrong person. You don't understand. Like I would fuck the act of fucking itself if I could.
She just said she wanted to get freaky and left the room. I'm almost certain I just heard the microwave.
My head. My head is the problem. Also alcoholism.
My password hint says "not sunset, also facebook." i need to stop doing computer things while high. I will never figure this clue out.
Hahaahaah I keep finding little notes you left me on my physics notes... "TOO HIGH FOR BIRDS"
i showed up sober to class for the first time. my prof said that i was "off my game today". i love philosophy
Pro: she asked me to be a bridesmaid. Con: i only have about nine months to get over a phobia of midget strippers.
You gave your one night stand my number. I told him you left for your sex change an hour ago.
I mean, she's batshit insane and once choked a guy with one hand but she's still MILF material in my book.
Just so u know, "come here buckey" has no effect on ur cat, but "hey fucker you wanna get high or what?" will cause him to run from the other room knocking shit over. We smoked outta the gravity bong, then he went and ate.
I swear we were drugged last night
We had a 130$ tab bitch. We drugged ourselves.
Randomize
