I want to bang chis in dee ass burt he be hating on me times two. Me be tryin ti love onu
Bendover
I woke up this morning with gum gluing my ass cheeks together..
I can't decide if I actually want to know or not..
Between the booze, mechanical bulls, and penis's I think my body hates it when I'm single
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
Nobody knows who they are, but they have an ice luge so they are welcome in my book
I just found my lube on the ground next to my bed. I would pay money to find out what the fuck happened that night.
Walking towards a police car with full spotlights on you while being fully erect..awkward exp. for both parties
My glasses were in the garbage this morning
By far the fardest thing to do drunk is open a band aid
PS- My flight is being emergency landed bc someone smuggled cats on the plane.
For both our sake, we've decided to ban watching combat sports before sex
I just got free tacos, you would be so proud of me.
Clarification, I got free tacos without performing any sexual favors.
I hope that will b the last time i take off my pants in the chemistry building.
Most people that see those numbers aren't going to realize what they mean and those that do will think 'oh those must be her favorite hockey players' and not 'oh she wants to see those hockey players fuck each other'.
Nah, we’re just sitting around talking about different kinds of boners
Randomize
