I just spent an hour correcting all the grammar and spelling of all the 2pac songs on my ipod
So we fuck and I say, "I'm about to go." He tells me, "No, leave at ten.. just lay here for a little while." When I ask, "Why?!" He gets his feelings hurt and says, "ugh. or don't." Since when did guys start acting like girls?
I put cups full of chips next to every bed, couch, and toilet so that everyone could have a snack when they woke up....
the fact that you could barely do more than slur incoherent sentences didn't stop you from correcting her grammar
the bouncer watched the girl drop her ID, saw me pick it up and say OMG SHE LOOKS LIKE ME, and then let me use it to get into the bar
Don't smoke out front when you get home there's gasoline involved I'll tell you later
I was thinking that, but I'm not sure the proper etiquette on asking about someone's nipple rings. Even if you did see them and compliment them once.
You're not drunk til you wake your roommates up screaming at your ceiling fan
I also tried to solve my dog's itching problem with crystal healing. I'm so high, dude.
I just rubbed amethyst all over him and kept saying 'no bites.'
His pillow talk sucks. It was like Mr. Roger's vagina.
yeah, I'm getting gagged by the cock of fate
I couldn't stop laughing at the fact he was cutting lines with a sears card. What 24 year old has a sears card?
I remember caressing his hands asking him if he moisturized, then i proceeded to put his hands on my face
final thoughts: i just want someone into choking me out, weed and anime
I didn't realize how much I relied on you for a reason to drink on tuesday
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