i tried to hook up with a mom and then her husband came with num chucks
i just walked in on him masterbating..to a picture of me. that definitely has to be true love.
just woke up in the hotel with gummi bears all around me and someone took the tv
we took the tv and as for the gummi bears don't eat them you put em in her vagina
if your not going to answer your phone this is just going to be an embarrassment tomorrow
i just feel like it would be irresponsible for you to not have sex with me again.
My vagina agrees.
I mean I don't object to weird looking penis as long as it gets the job done. I just need to get it in. I'm gonna be humping chairs soon.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
So basically I really like drugs AND banging cops and it's starting to get complicated
WHAT A DUMBASS ugh I'm so glad he looks like a middle aged dad now
He said it only counts if it ends up on the internet
Is there a reason why your pubic hair is a plastic bag on my bathroom floor? And yes I know its yours... You wrote your name on the bag
I just remembered something. We made out last night, people cheered.
After dropping your phone on the ground you got down and sat with it, kissed it and apologized for being so mean
please god let this picture I just uploaded not have my vagina in it
I'm not gonna lie, but for some reason I have this strong desire to watch porn with my pint of haagen das.
Randomize
