Turns out I'm a social drinker... I just happen to be REALLY social.
After last night's events, I googled "how to change your life direction." I found a really helpful ehow.com article.
i just unintentionally masturbated to my own facebook picture
It's all fun and games until the last slice of pizza gets bong water spilled on it.
Sitting next to a girl in the computer cluster who just googled syphilis symtoms, started crying & got up and left. My life suddenly seems better.
what's with the bloody hand print on the hood of your car
just used my nephews bottle to take my birth control
we convincced her parents we were only wasted meanwhile theire faces were morphing into one and i swear there was a reindeer in the background
Water skiing blazed is the most scary thing I've ever done.
Surely the maintenance men have seen worse than that condom right
My last 2 google image searches were 'a lot of pudding' followed by 'a generous portion of pudding'
If you can't seal the deal with her, I will. And you know I'll be successful. So there's your incentive
So shaving my butt whilst humming "be prepared" is now in my top five weirdest Friday night activities.
how early is too early to start drinking over the gilmore girls revival
I keep finding granola in my bed. This is what I get for sleeping with a guy from Oregon.
Randomize
