It was ok at first, but now im getting freaked out by him jerking off to me doing yoga
Responsibility does not care about your dick.
I can get head just about anywhere nowadays so that's not much of an incentive, coffee on the other hand...
Last time I stayed at my moms my fucking car got set on fire sooo maybe I should think this through.
We couldn't find him for like 4 hours. Turns out he was sitting under a tree and had thrown his phone in a lake because he couldn't figure out how to unlock it. Freshmen.
Frozen pudding on a popsicle stick. Bill Cosby would be so proud of drunk me.
I kind of want to throw a lot of things at him. Mostly blunt, heavy objects.
If it makes you feel any better... I have a friend who found out her mom was in the video for 2 Live Crew's "Pop That Pussy"
The beer bottle was sticking out of your zipper and you shook it onto unsuspecting patrons
Just saw the bridesmaid use her new sister in law as a stripper pole
Would it be weird if I bought knee pads and shin guards to fuck in my car?
I have a guy for practically everything... except for making me waffles on demand. will u be my waffle guy?
Just packed vodka and spare underwear into my purse- totally set for watching the hockey with him tonight
She said to call her, so I called her. Her boyfriend answered and traced the fucking call. I could litterally hear him yell because it turns out he lives in 4d
Don't you live in 4c?
Nice girl until she takes off the fake human suit and shows you the flesh eating demon she truly is
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