Another f*ing night of vodka youporn and xanax. I need to get a goddamn life
3 great things that go great together... But not on a Friday night. Perfect on say... a Tuesday.
There's people holding up abortion signs everywhere. I guess the people of Florida want you to remember you fucked up on Spring Break.
I'm sorry you missed class, the topic today is copy and paste. I'm not even kidding.
If he thought that flying across an ocean to visit me in London constituted sex, he thought wrong.
She called my landing strip a "vagina mohawk"....
Lesbians are weird.
Well, I made it thru a doorway, so I think things are going good.
Bought asot tix too. After Saturday I'm gonna be reborn like Jesus and no drugs until edc
Its perfect, I supply the pot she makes the brownies. I love the culinary dept.
We had sex in the church bell tower and somehow it still feels right.
Sorry I punched you in the throat. You got in my way. You understand.
We're making a scrapbook of dick pics, you want in or what?
Just Peed in a cup for my country. Fighting the good fight.
I just had a guy ask me if his "jewelry downstairs" would set off the metal detector.
how much of this shit do i need to take before i think its a good idea to set the house on fire and scream satanic mantras?
Should we make a shared Google doc list of places we want to fuck? Like a scavenger hunt?
Randomize
