This guy sitting next to me just bought a plot of land off the internet. On a whim. In the middle of class
i feel as if last night was a right of passage. to officially be an adult you must have a drunken one night stand with a co-worker and go to work the next day still drunk wearing yesterday's clothes...
After waking up today, I would like to find the Jesus preachers on campus to ask for help in asking for forgiveness to God.
Question: would asking the hot guy from the grocery store to "beer me" his number be a poor decision?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everybody in the immediate area is hooking up like it's doomsday
WHY AM I NOT THERE?
It was less of a bar, and more of an abandoned basement that some people sell booze in.
I got my eyebrow ring humped out. How is that even possible?
I still think it's strange your mom saw me 93% naked with a Santa hat on and a raging boner. Tis the season right?
YOU JUST GOT OUT OF THE HOSPITAL AND YOU'RE ALREADY DRINKING?!
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
did the thing where I quickly swipe right to every girl on Tinder & matched with my sis. God I hope swiping carelessly is hereditary
Em I need to know if his cum tastes like vodka. Report back.
The squirrels were at the front door. Dude I swear..
Do you think telling guys I'm majoring in magic is a good pickup line?
Want ramen today?
I need a salad
SALAD DOESNT WARM YOUR HEART AND BELLY
I finally realized he drank way too much when he tried serenading me to the song "come my lady" while slowly and creepily making his way toward me...keeping constant eye contact.
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