dear santa what can i do with your candy cane?
gotta love it when a reminder comes up on your phone and u think u forgot about a meeting or something then u read it and its only to remind me to go to the titty bar at 3
i found a dude playing guitar on the portapotty
I wonder what it would be like to masturbate in space
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
She had just swallowed, of course i didnt kiss her goodbye
Wasn't she moving abroad?
Are you really going to debate this?
i'm going through the NYU 2014 group looking for future drunken hookups. too slutty?
His mom walked into the kitchen smiling, made a scotch on the rocks, hit my bong, and told us goodnight enthusiastically. He's suddenly more appealing to me.
There's three frat guys comparing how you were in bed. apparently you have gotten worse with time
You know those creepy dolls that look like they are watching you from anywhere in the room? It was like that, but with his penis...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
blew off easter dinner with the fam to go play shot roulette. woke up in nothing but my boxers in the back of a random pickup truck.
He's not replying to my booty call. Like wtf. You have ONE PURPOSE IN LIFE.
She made me undress her with my teeth...explains the button in my shit this morning...
and please, if you feel the urge to call me crying tomorrow night, do so. i will be home bored and sober.
I went to my AA meeting last night. My drug dealer is now my counselor.
We're in an alley with a psychic wizard, shes reading our palms
Randomize