these burps are starting to have way more vomit in them,
Tonight's Real World episode reinforced the well-known fact that men of any caliber can hook up with girls named "Crystal"
So he told me he wanted to fertilize my caviar. Im avoiding all foreign exchange students from now on.
Apparently the cops have a video of me singing bob seger "Night moves".
I maybe late, he's in a peeing contest with the neighbor's dog. Currently he's in the lead.
I can honestly say I've never had orange soda poured on my vagina before, that's a story for the grand kids
Somehow me not being able to breathe due to cocaine doesn't seem very domesticated.
I'm not afraid to fist fight your child if I feel he is standing in between me and some tacos.
I asked a lamppost to be my valentine. Also: I'm wearing a sombrero. We need more sombrero in our lives.
I am still STD free so as far as I am concerned I never went to panama.
Any chance you used one if the curtain rods in the fireplace room as a sword? One is missing
Exactly. Stay back and unsubscribe from her
she keeps dunkaroos and gatorade in her bed. yep pretty sure im in love.
I don't know how I got home but I'm pretty sure the guy in my closet had something to do with it
If it's any consolation she turned out to be has a collection of clown dolls she talks to crazy. And the cops knew why I was calling when she key locked the door from inside.
Randomize
