Applied 4 a nanny job usin a Legit Site. Xplain to me how the couple I found offered me a 3some complete with 'sexy pics' of the wife blowin hubby. wtf?
obviously you're part succubus.
Girls don't like it when you cum inside them and then discuss baby names.
apparently smacking a customer in the face with his iPhone was not part of the WOW factor we learned in training...
She made me add her as a friend on fb before she got into my bed... I sense a stalker
i was so drunk i stopped mid-blowjob to make sure he i was with my boyfriend and not some random. twice.
Get everyone into the kitchen. I need you all to witness me friend-zoning him. Just in case.
I am now trying to reassure her that she doesn't have a wide-set vagina. So thanks, for whatever you said.
Would fucking the college coach be against recruiting rules?
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
You also hate cartoons and musicals, so I will take that to mean the movie was as awesome as I thought it was..smoke weed
BABE I MISS YOU SO MUCH LIKE THE SADNESS OVERWHELMS BONER ABILITY
Your vagina is like Nancy Drew lately.
I am available for nakedness
He was cute in a Sketchy-trying-to-sell-you-a-vaccum-at-9-at-night kinda way.
Sooooooooooooo you woke up on a rooftop. Classy
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