theres a middle aged lesbian couple holding hands on the bus and a 17 or 18 year old christian girl visibly staring freaked out and audibly praying about it
Does the whole "it was New Years" excuse apply this year?
you don't know true fear until you are a convinced that velociraptors are trying to kill you through your roof.
there are casual beer cans in all of the public trashes, i belong here
Are you high right now?
is that a question or a drake reference?
I'm surprised I haven't crapped out a leprechaun, I'm so hungover
Thanks for letting me use your ID, there's $120 along with your ID in the mail to cover the Urinating in public fine I got last night....sorry
If I asked you to guess what I'm doing right now how many guesses would it take to get to really high eating an apple bumping techno
Whiskey??
It will be at least another 6 weeks before I say yes again. I'm bruised. I stole sex cards and a really nice pocket knife. I acquired a vial of my own blood. Talk about a yard sale...
Currently sitting in the movie theatre bathroom while she gives him a blowjob in the parking lot. Don't ever tell me I'm a bad friend.
No man. Everyone needs to shit off a roof, at least once.
We smoked bowls and watched Cops for what seemed like hours. And yet I know I'll go back.
So do you know how we found out he was engaged?
An Amber Alert?
My mom just said we can't get married in nude body suits to look like earthworms. She's ruining my life.
beach body workouts will consist of dancing and cocaine, and sugar free redbull
Randomize
