the chair was smiling at me in sociology and i had to try not to burst out laughing.
1 stripper is 160/hr. 2 strippers is 280/hr. it would be fiscaly irresponsible to only get one.
Crisis Situation. How do you have that "we probably shouldn't make out tonight cause i've got an oral herpes outbreak coming on" conversation on a third date.
My mom just found some of our lube mixed in with my box of pots and pans. I hate moving home.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
what is the protocol for being hungover enough to vomit in a potted plant during my botany lecture?
and I believe it was when I was running to class to take a test still drunk in my Halloween costume that I realized I have reached that point in the semester where I just don't give a flying fuck anymore.
You can fuck me but I'm keeping my parka on.
Well we were going to compare notes, but all I could remember was throwing up, and all she could remember was kissing, so then we decided to not compare anything.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I've found a new low. I was climb-on-the-bar-piano drunk.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
The zombie version of you bit my friend's hand. No more zombie crawl for you. Not ever.
Terrible idea I love it
he told me that he only likes small dogs. I should have known he was going to end up being little bitch.
But once you are just right and I work my tongue in the right spots and hot wax your balls and inner thighs. I will have you right where I want you.
Who is this?
Oops wrong number
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