fun fact: cucumber in vinegar with pepper = best ever high snack
She wouldn't stop telling me the story of the penis and how she got laid.
You finger a girl once and she thinks she loves you. I'm going back to boys. Lesbians are needy.
All I did today at work was try to remember in vivid detail what your cock looks like.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I'm pretty sure you can't just waltz into a walk in clinic and ask them to de-baby you.
If there was a god I would have a big mac right now, but i don't
I officially lit my glove on fire while lighting the bong. Winter needs to end.
I really can't get over how proud I am of all us getting laid at the same time in the same apartment
I still can't believe you had sex with someone who willingly went by Peaches.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
I hope your perfect outfit is a slutty power rangers outfit. That's been my dream wedding since I was a kid.
I feel like having peed on eachother is a point in our lives we should never have gotten to...
umm, I just masturbated to old Justin timberlake on MTV jams. in need of dick ASAP
I'm the kind of gay who carries his anxiety medication in case the club scene gets too fierce
ill let you put your finger in a lot of things. but a ring is not one of them.
To describe how high he was he said, " I'm cocked out of my ape sandwich" so yes...that was some pretty good weed.
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