I think my favourite thing about cubicles is the fact that I can pick my nose at work
my last 3 google searches were anal itchy vagina and ice cubes
We're going on a mission for new porn. And ice cream.
The walk of shame isn't so shameful when you do it in a stolen, autographed Favre jersey.
Is it wrong that I didn't stop masterbating when the credit card company called?
did you answer or finish?
both
you read me verses from the beginners bible until my answering machine finally ran out of time and cut you off.
Thank you for the breast cancer awareness themed circle of death. Had it been any other time I would not have played topless.
hey remember that 14 year old i met 5 years ago who i said i would bang 5 years from then?
Yup.
he left his wallet here so lets treat ourselves to a lunch for the lack of penis we both had deal with
I fell asleep with my vibrator still in me. I am the Queen of Sad Masturbation.
Convinced lucas all the eggs in the fridge are fertilized and now he's crying.
My going away gift was all of them dancing around with solo cups on their dick and balls...these are my friends
GUESS WHO STILL HAS BOTH NIPPLES!
just saw those girls we met the other night. i happen to be wearing a bunny suit and driving your smart car. i think its safe to say thats a no go situation.
woke up this morning to a baggy full of adderall and two redbulls..i'm gonna marry this guy one day
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