Spotted: Pepto Bismol pink Scion with Ed Hardy sticker on front window, air freshener, and seat covers. Total Douchette Mobile.
For future reference, when you see people who look like Rosie O'donell, do not tell them they look like Rosie O'donell.
When are you comin back?
probably mid next week, depending on when i finish my remaining half gallons
At a party. It smells like teen pregnancy and sadness in here.
I had 800 mg of ibuprofen 2 b vitamins and I'm pounding water like I'm trying to win a hazing
Now that I'm hitting my bong, I realized I haven't missed something so much in a long time. I love Thomas the Dank Engine.
A BJ like that needs to be recommended.
While we were driving she just screams from the backseat: MUMFORD AND SONS DROP THE BANJO and made what were meant to be banjo sound effects
I am still awake. And let me sing you the song of my people. Ahem. "I have a bottle of hydrocodone and you all can fuck off."
He legit watched "Cops" the entire time he was fingering me.
I was thinking about the biological process causing me to puke while I was puking. THAT'S how much I'd been studying.
All im saying is that my face might fall off.
I will find, mount, and marry that person.
I am beginning to doubt your commitment to my making poor choices tonight
His bedroom is the preferred destination of MILFs, cougars, recent divorcees and sexually frustrated wives
His penis is my hero
Randomize