Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
Apparently they shut down a cook out cause people were selling drugsout the drive thru. Nice to be home
i just ate something from under my fingernail. i dont know what it was, but it tasted half decent
Which one of you FUCKERS filled the toilet with soil and planted my mothers daisys in it? NOT FUCKING HAPPY
Still workable. Pretty sure i told her i'd eat her out in the woods.
When i tried to give you something that wasn't tequila...like water....you kept saying it was against your religion.
I've always been the spiritual type.
Last night when I was hammered I set a reminder to tell you that your boobs are my favorite ones in the world, so this is me giving you that message.
Just dominated the men's bathroom at work. Sounded like the intro of a death metal song.
he's been in the country 4 hours and we just did it in the closet. he called me "miss flirtatious in the cupboard." i'm in love.
he just ordered a side of pineapple and winked at me. too much for a first date. come get me.
hey you sure the big one didn't have a penis she left the seat up
Why Weren't you wearing pants?
because pants are for people with no imagination
I just got a girl to make out with me just by saying "get at me." Get at me
I noticed while having sex on Friday that I have great endurance. CrossFit works.
I don't want to just hook up with random dudes. I've had enough bad sex to know that it's not worth hooking up with strangers
It's not?
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