what do people who dont have blackberrys do while they poop?
I just hemmed my dress for halloween, never felt more like a man
the dr. explained that the first big patch is called a herald patch since it's biggest. So his name is Harold the Patch.
Wow. You named your rash.
I am wasted and people are fist pumping. This should not happen on the west coast.
Something about a hand job in a car doesn't scream girlfriend
Sorry for punching you in the face last night. I should have known the boxing gloves were a bad idea from the start.
Hey everyone. This evenings celebration will commence with a cocktail hour at genghis at 830 to be followed with an upscale dining experience at taco bell at 10. All are welcome. This is not a joke. Thank you
We decided this year instead of not participating in Halloween at all we are going to hand out free beers to the parents.
Grindr hookup awareness: always make sure that you agree to blow one person and they aren't bringing a Friend/boyfriend. Shits weird when you're sober.
you know it's been too long when the heat of a pizza box on your lap turns you on.
I don't think this guy is worth it unless he's a skilled sexual amigo
bitch i am allowed to be rude i just fought cold hard porcelain with my face
Not sure if your roommate speaks German while sleeping, or if she woke up, figured out we were fucking, and used German to swear at us.
I am 5' 11" of pure, uncut Fuck Off right now.
Why did I wake up next to the fire pit? And who wrapped me up like a burrito?
Jägerbombs. Thank Sara.
Randomize
