so heres a good story. about 6 hrs ago i took a bath with bruce blasting. and 6 hrs later i woke up still in my bathtub but in cold water
no i did not stop my best friend from eating out my sister...bros before hoes
I looked at my arm when I woke up..I guess after 8 tally marks I said fuck it and wrote "too much"
If someone cleans their bathroom and shaves their crotch for you you kinda have to admit the relationship to facebook
he said the way to his heart was through his stomach, i told him if he wanted to eat my food he had to eat my kitty
smooth operator
Dude, dont worry about the lamb fetus in the fridge.
What?
Just dont open the beer drawer.
I just beer bonged. Soco and spite please get on my levvl my hair is in buns
The best, and by the best I mean the worst, was the 7 month along pregnant chick in the skin tight body suit.
I can HEAR him staring at your boobs.
Dude tried texting you during but she threw my pants too far away
just like cleaning my room and being more organized in my life. more so just making sure a toaster doesn't end up in my car again for 2 months
I'm debating a nap but also debating breaking into the liquor cabinet
I still can't believe that dog licked my nipple.
What are u up to today?
Marathon sex and eating.
He stopped the gas pump at 69 and gave me my receipt. He wants it.
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