WTF I just almost got ran over by a fucking cop!!!!!!
LOL you shoulda thrown yourself in front for money. Fucking cops!
There is no way when we get home that nothing will hapen
drugs are my only escape from this reality. good thing I got it at a discount price last night
Wow. 8.8 earthquake hit Chile this morning
didn't feel it. :)
It's like 5 thousand miles away of course you didn't.
wait what? so it's not in america?
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If he starts "inventing" things cut him off. The last thing he invented was chocolate chip green beans and he destroyed my kitchen
He made off the wall shots in beer pong, stuck the girls dog in a cooler, and played with swords with her mom. I wish I got his name
I still don't know why you took that job... it sounds miserable
not having any beer money sounds even more miserable
He got punched in the face, dropped his laptop down a flight of stairs, and broke his roommate's lava lamp, getting all the toxic lava goo everywhere. This is why we don't let him get drunk. And yet here we are.
The taxi driver was going on about how many drunk chicks want to sleep with him when he drives them home. Not sure if he was bragging or hinting
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I threw up in the kitchen on the floor and a guy tried cleaning it up with a spoon at a party.
He asked if I had feelings for him while I was lying naked on the floor vomiting into a trashcan as he held my hair and fed me Pringles.
omg he is no good in bed, bless his little heart and his big dick
I've been really sick the past 4 days. Last night, I actually turned down a bj. I may be dying.
Long story short I ended up getting choked out by a really hot guy in the girls bathroom at a bar last night
We're sort of like brothers. Except with more sexual tension. And we don't look alike. Or are related.
So we're not much like brothers really.
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