I think god was stupid personally. The clit should be inside the vagina. Idiot.
my coke dealer is running a Black Friday special
I don't care if you go out, because at the end of the night I know i'll be the one fucking you.
that was completely unnecessary, true, but unnecessary
You NEED to get fingered by a violinist. He used his left hand and make me cum, he's RIGHT handed.
Despite fighting the urge to vomit throughout the whole thing, I think that interview went really well!
thanks so much for stopping me from telling him i want to have sex with him while i proceeded to hookup with the air.
I'm pretty sure my lung is caught on my rib. And I can't feel the left side of my face. Best. Sex. Ever.
no, but he did start crying. who the fuck is 30, covered in tattoos and crys about an ex? get your shit together, man.
So I totally just used margarita salt for a body scrub.
like stop just cause your whole life has been one enormous reject pile does not mean that i have to suffer too
the reputation of my dick game is on the line. You're killing the team, here, G
You know what I realized today? That my biggest regret of freshman year was ditching you and that foam party to have a one night stand with a skinny jean wearing vocal major.
I am concerned for your priorities but also really flattered. Flattery wins
My liver is fucking rocky. Get knocked down 7 times and gets up 8. World champ
I have to hand it to her. In my heyday I took home the 'biggest shitshow of the night' award 9 times out of 10. But I passed the torch on to her last night, and she went skipping merrily far and away with it into the enchanted world of aggressive alcoholism. Is this 30?
And to be clear I have only watched porn like 3 times at work
Randomize
