She fell onto my light and broke all four plants. I don't care how good the blowjob was.
No stds, not pregs, and lost two pounds. I'd call that a successful two years of grad school.
I justified spending $400 stocking my bar to my sister by saying it was an investment
Personally I think it's a tremendous investment
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Please tell me I did not ask the bartender how big his dick was.
I'll always be here to give you immoral support.
i need to start using my dry humping skills. i was dry humping champion in 7th grade
It's not like I ment to feed you the shots of vodka, my hand just kinda slipped.
My mom just made me promise her that i'll care about the next guy I sleep with
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Hungover, threw up in a cosmetic case in my car this morning. This is real life.
I got asked to "be the filling in a man sandwich." You don't get to pick the club again. EVER.
I had a glass of wine for breakfast. It's gonna be a rough week.
Just remember: We don't tell our English professor about our fetishes unless she specifically asks about them.
Let's just wait to see what happens before we start making radical plans and starting fires
all I know is that I was naked, and there were cheeto puffs everywhere...
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