dude i totally did the walk last night came out of her room to see her dad sitting there straight lookin at me...wtf
Dude, Her having kids just means she puts out.
there are so many fish in the see you have left to fuck
he designed a suit out of pillows to protect himself when he fell.
engineering majors are such efficient drunks.
that's why i use the vibrator in the tanning bed. multitasking. plus then my rooms doesnt know how pathetic of a life i lead.
Wanna go watch Transformers and scream "AMERICA!"? I need a no thought activity
All I wanted was a quiet evening to masturbate and eat cake and instead you ruined it by bringing girls over.
Im having a christmas reunion party tonight. Last year i ate my own contact. We'll see how this year goes
As a fat white girl from Texas I can honestly say that she gave fat white girls from Texas a bad name.
She's just so happy...and so naked.
God loves me. So high, craving Jimmy Johns chips, looked down, unopened bag in front of me. Still doesn't feel real
Just rolled up a joint with a cop standing right beside me. He just told us to not leave behind any garbage or empties. God I love canadian camping
It's a sad day when ur phone automatically updates u on Thursdays that traffic is normal and how long it will take to get to the bar
That's fucking great actually
Orgasms and cereal.... that's what life's about.
The work outs are working. Someone just said my body type was “Tits On A Stick”.
Randomize
