He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
My jaw hurts. Such a slutty injury..
just stared at ed norton's ass for 26 miles. if there was ever an incentive to run a marathon, that was it. my life is perfect.
Last day of classes. 1st day attending every class. I'm proud of myself
just taught 3 girls from korea how to fist pump on chat roulette.
frozen drink friday is suspended until further notice
It's awesome, he has so much more free time now that he's not screwing other girls behind my back
Oh fuck, I messaged a Jack Kerouac poem to a girl I'm trying to sleep with last night at 4am.
I posted her number in the m4m casual encounters area of Craigslist.
I guess her always saying "gay men love me!" will finally get put to the test.
I'm not saying I haven't been that drunk. I'm just saying I haven't been that drunk and then have cops buy me shots.
I just want to pat him on the head, bake him some cookies, and reassure him that, someday, he will get laid.
Today's psa: there are certain parts of your body you shouldn't scratch while wearing fake nails.
you just tore your cootch a new one, didn't you?
Word to the wise, never look up your hot young doctors on Facebook before you're discharged. You will find things and no longer be able to take them seriously.
I just want you to know you're the worst sister ever.
If this is about me and your ex, it's not my fault she doesn't like men.
That's nice of you to be concerned, but I'm pretty confident I'll marry someone 30 years older than me, ride out being the trophy wife for 10 or 15 years, then live large!
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