Bea Arthur died yesterday
You shut your stupid mouth
Betty White is next, I just know it.
Betty White will never die! She's like Dick Clark. Rue McCalahan is next.
woke up to find a pram in the balcony. first thing we did was look over the edge!
it was 5AM and you were field goal kicking solo cups into the sink
I got 70 on my final, or put differently, I got a "still graduating" on my final.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
I couldn't accept the bj. My penis has done nothing wrong and didn't deserve the punishment of her face.
would it be subtle enough if I played birthday sex on repeat while I may or may not be stripping?
I need to make a 'no kissing' rule for my casual hookups during cold season...this cold is so not worth it.
some guy just burried his vomit in the sand.
Found your glasses drenched in ketchup on my driveway this morning
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He made me cum 4 times, we high fived afterwards and then I proceeded to tell him about this guy I'm dating whilst I made him a bacon sandwich. I think we've finally mastered being friends with benefits.
When he pulled it out last night I asked if that was as hard as it was going to get. I think I may have offended him.
I'm gonna try Jim's breakup remedy this weekend.
Is that the one where you drink 3 cases of beer and rewatch as much WWE RAW as you can find? Or the one where you hookup with fatties on Craigslist?
He was publicly touching my boobs before I even knew he's a famous World Cup skier.... That's how hot he was
I should buy myself lingerie for Valentine’s Day instead of a present for you because I am the present
Then it hit me - his penis wasn't a shiny new toy anymore and I wanted a new one.
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