I forgot i ate a salad for dinner, so while i was barfing in his toilet, i kept screaming "i ate leaves?? i cant believe you let me eat leaves!"
I just cleaned my sheets and decided to do a black light test. My headboard is a masterpiece.
bio was interesting today. swabbed my mouth to see what the cells where, ha. found a sperm cell. he was just that awesome
His car is carseat is compatible. I checked while we were banging in the back seat...
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
I AM HAVING A WEIRD OUT OF BODY EXPERIENCE. IN CAPS LOCK.
Just got a blow job while taking my online quiz. How is life in the dorms treating you?
I feel like I just gave a blowjob to a freight train.
my drivers license is super glued to my shoulder and im to hung over to get it off come and help me
Hey do you eat chocolate chip pancakes with bacon in?
DO NOT MAIL ME A PANCAKE
Who put the meatball sub on my door handle?
Mom said it is up to us to plan Thanksgiving. Hooters or Scores?
Or???
Haha! I swear, it's like I'm talking to Buddha with a slutty agenda. You are so full of wisdom.
Did you throw up out the back door and cover it with paper towels?
I texted her that I burned my tongue drinking coffee so it hurt to talk or kiss... How many points do I get for doing her without talking or making out first?
Randomize
