I must be too annoying 4 u.
Your vagina is a self cleaning oven.
Where were you when I was single???
Still in diapers.
Where are you???
With some dude on the way to his house to blaze
You went back to a stranger's house????
He isn't a stranger...he used to be on kids, inc.
I love LA.
my debit card account is gonna say movie, movie, ice cream, movie, cheese fries, get a fucking life, movie
Well, let me tell you, it was the most vivid sex dream I've ever had. More so than the Paris Hilton one I had in 05. And about as weird.
Well, I made it all the way to the gas station. And from there, I begged a cab driver who was parked outside, to give me a piggy back ride the final 2 blocks to my apartment. I wasn't in the cab. Didn't have to pay. Drunk me is smart, and very lazy.
That moment when you cant decide between eating spaghetti or a Popsicle for breakfast
I AM HANGING OUT WITH ADORABLE DOGS SURROUNDED BY NATURE. GOD BLESS AMERICA AND ALSO BYE CIVILIZATION AND PANTS.
Are you at a park?
I had to dig my own trench to puke in at the resort. That much fun.
I plan on blacking out and milking a cow
Hypothetically speaking, when I get a sugar glider would it be frowned upon to bring it Ito classes with me in m pocket?
There is an episode of "how it's made" on tv right now. The subject is tequila and water beds. Basically my life.
I woke up with my winter coat on, next to a polaroid of me, her and a swan...so no I don't remember our conversation.
All I remember is being in the middle of the road puking and my bestfriend cheering me on from the passenger seat...
Randomize
