Dual....:-)
you keep denying me to hang out, should i take a hint?
you keep asking me after midnight, should i take a hint?
went out last night and woke up on the bathroom floor again, thinking about just moving my bed in there.
I'm going to but the new Playboy with Chelsea Handler on the cover. I'm pretty sure it's the only time buying a Playboy will make me gayer...
We argued about the championship during sex. Absolutely the manliest moment of my life.
positive spin of the day: since my nose is blocked from allergies cleaning the puke this morning was much easier
After four attempts, his condom would not flush. I had to remove it with salad tongs.
Just made macaroni burritos. Fukkin awesome. We'll have to try this when I'm sober.,!
Sometimes I envy you, when I'm not praying for your soul.
Fried chicken is a must. Do strippers eat fried chicken or should I plan on something else?
Just puke n rally. People can't judge, it's syllabus week.
GOVERNMENT SHUTDOWN NO RULES ICE CREAM FOR BREAKFAST woooo!
Hahahaha don't tempt me. Remember we're trying to avoid airport jail if possible
You want to know how I feel? I feel like Cady Heron pushed me in front of a bus last night.
I think it stinks she’s cheating on him. My vagina on the other hand is tingly thinking about a summer of sexual healing
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