So when jo picked me up from the bar I kept apologizing and kept telling her "I'm just a wittle donut"
well my last 2 orgasms were over shoe sales at macy's. what does that tell you?
I can’t believe the potential orgy I left behind at Waffle House.
I can't believe all I ate yesterday was half a turkey sandwich and 20 finger licks of exctasy.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
did we cross streams again? the only thing I remember is seeing a dick
Caught in the act of lying. Lipstick literally all over his dick. He tried to make some story about darkwing duck or some shit but failed to realize he is a complete moron.
Hardcore start to spring break. Mike is wearing adult diapers because the only stop we are making is for gas.
The last text I sent him was about nachos. Frankly, if he can't respond positively to that he can fuck off...
Woke up naked next to Alex and he was braiding my hair and then commented on how healthy my hair was. I don't even know anymore..
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Well I was kicked out of the bar and woke up on a picnic table. I'd say the night was awesome!
I wish the guy I was sleeping with wasn't on house arrest.
i swear every fucking time i plan a party, one of our "friends" holds their shit in all week just to punch one off into the master bathroom after i pass out. it's almost like that dump you would see in a port a potty.
Will you skip merrily into hell with me?
Here when you come to your senses come back here and I'll fuck you back out of them.
EMERGENCY SUBJECT CHANGE. SHE DOESN'T KNOW.
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