it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
handjob tips. give me some.
dude, never let a drunk girl playbite your dick. the doctor came in laughed and left.
He walked in, tore open the drawer, pulled out a condom, and slammed it shut. He was that ready.
Apparently I have a urinal in my bedroom
Penises. Penises everywhereeeeeeeee. Penis ratio is sooo disproportionate. I can't NOT get laid tonight.
Was this before or after he told that homeless man outside the bar about his past sexual experiences?
We tried lying really still and being really quiet so that he wouldn't notice us before he left the room. Forgot about the glow in the dark condom.
You got her pregnant one week before your vasectomy? You couldn't wait one week to cheat on me?
All three shower stalls were filled with couples fucking and then someone yelled "switch" and... We switched
The joke is on me because whale penis is forever in my search history.
Worth it.
I don't want random pictures of your morning wood. It's like, what a glorious morning oh a penis.
me + whiskey = a bad person
Oh god...Did I just fuck a sugar granddaddy?!
Woke up in a house I don't know, with someone else's pants on, and wolverine hair, to my girlfriend yelling on the phone about the 4 girls I made out with last
Randomize
