Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
it hasn't hit me that college is over yet. so far at home, i haven't brushed my teeth, taken off my makeup, or changed clothes before bed.
yea and when she crawled to her room she yelled at a bookbag to "get the fuck out my way"
ew. I made a sandwich, and the cheese reminded me of her vagina
I wonder who the first pervert was, and if he would be proud of me for advancing his art form by so much
for me the strap perfect is like a chastity belt
No one intentionally makes bad decisions, just errors in judgement. You have your boyfriend I have a restraining order from universal studios. It's all relative
Your doorknob is in my back seat, in case you were looking for it.
Why does every bad decision I make wind up having 1000 likes on YouTube?
I'm just trying my hardest not to get addicted to drugs or pregnant and all your other friends are out there getting married
You fucked that MILF against my car!
How would you know?
She scratched her name into my window with her bigass wedding ring. btw she wants you to call her
I'm counting my small victories this morning. For instance, I haven't puked at work yet.
I said "one day" and that day is not today
yeah, last night we handcuffed you and you started crying saying that you weren't a bad person
The fuck kind of sorcerer makes a pact with tequila
Most of the people I know from AA
Haha touché
Randomize
