are you so shy because you have an std?
it was like my fingers were behind enemy lines
Is it a problem that I find my wife's 16 year old niece sexy?
Now that I'm 21, I feel like I'm letting North Dakota down by not being drunk everyday
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
It was an awkward 3some. I took her from behind while he just made out with her.
You don't have to believe me. My vagina knows it happened.
She cheated on me with the same state trooper that wrote me a ticket.
I guess now you have a way to keep your license when you bring that up in court.
Dude, you are the most awesome.
I'm on a mission. But just to make out with him so his relationship collapses and he is single when I come back in April.
Thats the last time im "arresting" you to get out of paying your bar tab.
What?! The only reason I married your sister is to have a Cop in the family!
Can cross "get fingered at a state park" off my bucket list
"Only you can prevent yeast infections."
I almost had sex in a public restroom last night in case you're wondering how much of a mess 22 is for me
I mean. I just want to sit in my bed and eat bagels. What's wrong with that?
SORRY FOR THE CAPS. I DIDNT CHANGE IT IN TIME AND ITS TOO FAR TO GO BACK NOW. PS IM SUPER BAKED
The smoothie place is closed, but the liquor store is open and wine is kinda like a smoothie.
Randomize
