He just posted pic of sad weiner and half a butt cheek. That is it. I HATE online dating.
I hope you remember pushing the girl off the stage because you said she wasn't good at pole dancing.
Just put my hand under my pillow and found a peach ring. Lat night just came rushing back.
Which genius got me a voicemail of myself puking?
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Everyone in the office is in total denial. I asked my boss what he did this weekend and he said "nothing much." But I know we were both thinking about the orgy.
Lets ignore the fact that you want to turn your dorm room into a sex dungeon and focus on the real issues here.
We need a bunch of roses, some chocolate, 2 cops, a mariachi band, and a thermometer
Also the fuck cup must be buried with me
After I came she just held my balls until I fell asleep. It was like adult swaddling. Magical...
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Can we talk about the fact that a stranger is doing a line of coke off our living room table right now?
Then a third Canadian I didn't know showed up to the hotel room at like 3am. I let him sleep in our bed because he had pizza.
I will feed you tacos. I will touch your butt. Happy Valentine's Day ❤️
From what I remember I had fun, until I threw up, and lost my shoes..
Like either my tits got bigger or I've succumbed to Trumps tiny hand syndrome
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
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