Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
i don't understand how she was down there for so long, she's like a mermaid, a blowjob giving mermaid.
throwing condoms aimed at his crotch probably isn't the politest way to ask for sex
Everything was good until you pulled the bartenders hair because she cut you off
you fucked my boyfriend. margarita girls night will not fix this.
hes like the used car salesman of hook ups and closed the deal w my taking him home with me,as is,today
She said, "awww, you're so sweet" after I started putting on a condom. How many STDs have I just contracted?
So yeah never trust sex tips from yahoo answers
All I've succeeded in doing since I saw you is drool on my shoulder
did you know gatorade and rum go really good together
Are you doing depressed science again
maybe
Ok, so technically yes she wore a red tank top to the stoplight party. But under it was a yellow bra and green panties.
I am making up for a 7 year dry spell so I get a pass and I don't always care if there is a second date. It is like college but with more money and condoms.
Oh, cold wet seat on the 48! Are you piss? Are you the sweaty ass leavings of an obese person? Are you the spilled King Cobra from the night before? I do not know! I dare not smell to find out... Pants ruined...
You know you're too drunk when you start calling people out for unfollowing you on social networks.
I didn't tell that thing I wasn't coming over. Whoops
You know you haven't dated in a while when you call boys "that thing" and call dates "a boy type thing."
Randomize
