Tell me exactly where it said it wasn't a unisex bathroom.
Want to have sex later?
This feels like a trap
Take one last look at my face, because I'm drinking it off tonight.
Did she have bad breath? Bad breath makes you think of all the bad things in the world
And it was confirmed to me that I did in fact cut my girlfriend out of her dress with my sword.
she just punched a dude and called him a peasant for not drinking fast enough in flip cup.
A girl just told me she printed out my pictures and taped them on her wall. I have to stop sleeping with virgins.
We just leapfrogged all the way to the bar.
Nothing like playing hide and seek with a state patrol officer early in the morning to get your heart rate up.
He told me his cum shot melted the paint on his bedroom wall and asked if I want to see it
So my roommate and I have a written agreement stating that if he tries to sleep with his ex girlfriend, I have to immediately intervene and nut punch him then send her on her way.
this is the most serious roommate agreement ever
I knew no one else would have gone along with it since it's morally wrong and probably illegal. You said, "Yes. And let's add fireworks."
We played table tennis, but used tv remotes taped to our foreheads instead of paddles. Every time your opponent scored you took a shot. I'm the current champion as of last night.
I mean, how am I going to build a relationship on trust if he finds out I roofied him?
I farted in the parking garage and it echoed.
Randomize
