he whipped it out and it smelt like my toilet after taco Tuesday
so my car got towed last night. I didnt know it cost 118 dollars to have a college experience
If we both stop thinking about your penis for just a moment, we'd realize it is important and good that you are spending quality time with your family
Some dude gave me a questioning look as I came out of the women's toilet. I just responded 'blowjob' and he understood, then shook my hand.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Depending on hangover severity. The fact that I can spell severity is in your favor.
She came over and gave me a handy and then just lingered for a day and a half. Worst weekend ever.
I projectile vomited in his sisters room where the toiled would have been if it were the bathroom.
How do you think the people in my class would react if I ripped all my clothes off and jumped on him right now?
Remember those girls from the bar? The tall and short blondes?
Is this a story I am going to hate you for?
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
Peanut butter balls.
IF YOU EVEN COME NEAR MY BALLS AGAIN I SWEAR TO GOD
when you come home i just want to let you know we are cats now. and we are out of eggs.
You were definitely drunk. You gave him an otphj in front of everyone.
My one night stand said I love you, opened my fridge, stole my cream cheese and left.
Hey by the way did you notice my third nipple in my snapchat
Oh, do you remember telling everyone you were with that your vagina was angry last night?
Randomize