carls jr on main st. japanese tourist taking a dump in the urinal. reading a japanese newspaper and wearing a full suit.
be there in 3 mins
my house keeper must think I'm a prostitute.
your drunk mistake has arrived...he is the one wearing a poncho
I know. I almost started crying. IN WHAT UNIVERSE IS THAT A TURN ON?!
I am not going to ask my mother to pause a movie so I can have phone sex.
just watched a cripple ollie in his wheelchair to get on to the elevated floor in the bar. I. LOVE. WISCONSIN
Just had a tranny complement my outfit. Looks like I'll have to change before we go out.
I just looked at a girl and was like what disease does she have? And then my mind caught up ohhh shes pregnant.
He tried to spell out "PROM?" in his cum on my stomach during sex. It was terrible
well did you say yes?
Those mornings you wake up with a Barbie tramp stamp are the mornings that are the that are going to make me miss this place
Now if u will excuse me I have to go prep my vagina for this amazing sex filled weekend I'm about to encounter
But yeah, that is officially the new "I just came" picture
KY in my mouth and throat does not a party make.
tbh i just wanted to fuck a guy with forearm tattoos but then he was so FORWARD about it
you just don't appreciate it because you've never been arrested
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