if you take his cock out, you have to give him a bj. it's like giving a moose a muffin.
ya i vaguely remember microwaving a whole package of bacon for 20 minutes or so and then eating it all around 4am
There really should be an "avoid ghetto" option on my GPS.
he told me my vagina needed a tic tac
He poured syrup on all those broken dishes because "syrup is magical, and by the time we wake up, they'll be fixed."
We removed her tutu and her cape, so there's no risk of her strangling herself.
It'll be just me and my penis against the world.
His penis will pick the quickest route to vagina. it's like an biological onstar.
All I remember was endless tequila and pulling karate moves from 3 Ninjas Kick Back towards the guy at 7 Eleven. Explanation?
Just had to masturbate in the bathroom because mom changed my room into a "knitting" room. I hate coming home.
I'm pretty sure every guy I've been with this weekend has made a solid attempt at getting me pregnant...
I really want to fuck that guy in the full wind breaker suit
I hooked up with a guy named Quan.. I literally hit the Quan
MY COWORKER IS ATTRACTIVE AND I DROPPED A SONIC THE HEDGEHOG JOKE IN CONVERSATION I FUCKED UP
If you wanna fuck the pudding, fuck the pudding. Just not the chocolate, Im gonna eat that.
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