The Redheads category on Pornhub is my number 2 site behind facebook on google chrome. I think I have a problem
he urdandictionary'ed 'tease' on his phone and made me read through all the definitions. Am i really that bad?
You slept in the bed with him... with your top off.... and just made out with him....
It was everywhere, it looked like he just took the leftovers and threw them around the bathroom... Festively...
I puked all over his apartment, then slept with the skinniest girl here. Which isn't saying much in Ohio.
i woke up next to a ladle and a packet of chocolate biscuits that my face had melted into one giant biscuit.
no i had to finish in the bathroom to a pic of her mom in a bikini.
When his Irish accent comes out my uterus hums. Or some productive organ down there, I'm not sure of the logistics
Youre the drunk baby that everyone wants to take care of.
This hurricane was the perfect excuse to buy 2 pounds of animal crackers and a case of beer. It's on Sandy.
I just remembered you throwing bread at me and getting me to drink water out of a heineken bottle. You are my best friend.
Technically, I traded a soft pretzel for sex last night...
Dude, half of south Mississippi has seen my taint. I'm not worried.
Can I drink yet?
It's Monday morning.
Your point?
Just had a threesome for the second time in my life. I don;t even enjoy threesomes. Too much effort.
HOW DO THESE THINGS KEEP HAPPENING TO YOU?
I can't really feel a difference, so essentially I paid 60 bucks to bedazzle my vag.
Randomize
