Omg. It looks like a crack pipe exploded in your mouth.
you were chalanging people to drink the "worlds biggest jager bomb" - a VASE of Redbull and a PINT of Jager... is it no wonder you dont remember anything?
I just spread your mom's ashes with my new girlfriend. I wouldve waited for you to fly home but she was uncomfortable in the house with her remains there. I'll mail you the urn since u handpainted it.
YOU HAVE A GIRLFRIEND ALREADY!?! WTF WE JUST HAD HER FUNERAL 3 WEEKS AGO!!!!!!!!!!!!
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
Decided against hooking up with creepy stalker guy for a ride to work. I feel I've earned a few self respect points back.
The bartender just asked me if I owned stock in Jameson. I've been here for less than an hour and he's already judging me.
DO NOT GO IN OUR BATHROOM. it cannot be unseen
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
Also, I'm going to yoga because I have a Taylor Swift range of emotions right now.
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
This Alex the guy who suck your belly ring
I just ran into the woods like an idiot because ADVENTURE.
My new boobs got me 12 drinks at the concert. Whose the real winner here?
Please tell me that I didn't call you to say I was swimming in outter space
THIS THING HATES MY LIVER
Just got my second shot
Baller. We’re going to be knee deep in strippers and coke in 10 days
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