i turned job hunting into a drinking game..
Whoever said drinking more helps a hangover didn't drink 96% of a fifth of whiskey last night. This is absurd.
Working on an important paper into the wee hours of the morning, and every time I type the word "situation," I can't help but think of effing Jersey Shore. Those guidos are now ruining my academic life.
that's the last time we turn jepordy into a drinking game.
Restaurants Roasting People Who Gave Them Negative Yelp Reviews (25 Pics)
thinking back, the fact that our bartender was missing a finger shouldve been hint number one not to let him pick our drinks
I have a feeling she doesn't appreciate me as a person. She only fucks me because I look like Harry Potter.
I was the king of the handle race. My team finished it in 56 minutes.
you don't get it. Nobody wins a handle race. there just degrees of losing.
It's now 8:05 on a Wednesday night and I'm already going home with my bra in my purse.
I am pretty damn sure that neither my body or his body is ready for how drunk I am getting tonight
Woman Posts Harassing DMs From Creep Online, Now He’s Upset Because People Told His Mom
He better not be in your backpack
So my booty call knows your bf. Apparently they were in jail together
I love you. You know I enjoy the constant sex noises
Just in case you forgot, you puked all over your boss house, pissed on his coffee table, and were then thrown out by his wife
I don't care how many things you caught on fire, it's still not as bad as doing coke and then filming yourself having sex.
she was sitting on the toilet asking for me to take a "cute facebook profile picture" for her
Randomize