i got kicked out of Barns and Nobles cuz i put all the bibles in the fiction section
he was going down on me when he saw the warts...nevertheless he told me he had to pick his sister up from school. why does this keep happening to me???
rather than putting your name in guys phones, you just texted 90999 to donate $10 to Haiti and then gave it back to them
I'm gonna laugh so hard when we're both married with families
That statement alone makes me laugh so hard.
that girl is introducing herself into your group of friends one dick at a time.
She's like the little sister I never had ... except for the fact we're having sex.
He looks like Ryan Reynolds from this angle
Since when is drunk an angle?
I'm just gonna plan on never getting a bf. everything I touch turns to gay
don't get you morals all over my torrid fantasties
Would it be inappropriate to rub one out in the gym shower? I mean, technically, I pay $80 a month to do what I want so could they really say anything?
Shower is fine. Steam room is shady. I've probably done both at one point in my life so I can't be used as a good reference.
Dude if you're not gonna answer them I'm gonna stop snapchatting you my hook ups
I don't remember where I was but I remembered that I hated everyone there
my throat is bruised, my back is scarred, my vagina feels like it's going to fall off.. you're like godzilla. you destroy everything.
He's a real gentleman. At least he tried to flush my closet's handle after he pissed in it.
You and your dick were a topic of high regard tonight
Randomize
