Not only do prius' look terrible they are terrible to have sex in
I wish you could see the look on my boss's face right now.
wtf?
Before you passed out in the middle of the NHL 10 party you had to prove that you were a better fighter than Patrick Kane. Your not. Thanks for the black eye dipshit.
the best job he will get is a sex ed teacher in alabama
I hope no one at work will be able to read the "who wants body shots" on my chest. I forgot about it.
Sorry about that whole "setting your deck on fire" thing.
it was like lady and the tramp only with a jello shot on the pool table
I just had a contest with the toilet to see who could hold their breath longest.
I won
Nothing like the It's a Small World ride at Disneyland to remind you to take your birth control. I took it on the boat yesterday
Get a piano. I want to have sex on it.
I have the relationship skills of Miley Cyrus and I could've said this was a bad idea
There is a midget in cheetah face paint on a leash here
I mean, I already hooked up with her boyfriend. The least I can do is accept her facebook friend request.
not only did u rap a voicemail to me last night.... but it lasted so long that it cut you off so you called back to finish..... never do this again
Never underestimate the power of titties
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
Randomize
