i think he just uses that whole "grew up in a castle" thing to get pussy
One of my students just said I have "big mommy parts". Even third graders know that my tits are too big. God I love em.
they duct taped my keg cup to my hand with my sister's phone number on it. I should be ok tonight.
I waited so long to accept his friend request that he canceled it. So I added him and when he accepted I deleted him. I wonder how long this will be funny to me
Everytime I am with a guy I hope his penis is as big as yours. It never is. Thanks for setting that bar.
You keep saying things....but all I'm hearing is kegs
I deem her datable let the dance of attraction commence
What changed your mind?
Being sober
You're obviously not trying hard enough. GET LAID. Kittens die for less.
Touche salesman.
He came over and said its legs day so put them in the air! Fucked me for 30 minutes and said he had dinner reservations to go to. Well i just ran into him and his friends hammered at Taco Bell
I was thinking that maybe I should not apply to Wells Fargo because they def have me on candid camera taking a drunken nap at 3am in their lobby.
Maybe the problem is guy has to ask his wife if he can go out to lunch with his girlfriend for an hour...
Pornhub is still operational. Therefore, the world has NOT come to an end in the blizzard!
The best thing about this time of year is that all I have to do is add a random mardi gras decoration to my cart full of alcohol and boom, no more judging
Just for future reference. Do not do zumba while stoned out of your mind.
Randomize
